The Truth About Obama Revealed!

WOW!

I suspected Obama was in fact a robot, but I didn’t want to come strait out and say it, so the Samurai employed his armies of  intelligence gathering allies and I found a cryptic clue to our president’s true nature.

While meditating in my expansive garden, I received mysterious  manila envelope via messenger pigeon  with the words “The Truth” scrawled on it in crayon.  Suspecting it was just another death threat written to me by an angry circus midget,  I opened it, instead finding two photographs.  The first, is  This:

An inocent meeting

An innocent meeting?

An Innocent enough Photograph of our president meeting with prominent Black Leader Al Sharpton.  Innocent enough perhaps,  but The Sender of this mysterious  message had informs me of something disturbing: this photo was a fake!!
Immediately I wondered what this had to do with my queries into the true nature of our President? Why would President Obama, a known associate of Sharpton, fake a picture of the two meeting?
Then, I was hit with the hideous truth, the REAL picture, in all it’s utter weirdness:
Obama Battles Mecha-sharpton!

Obama Battles Mecha-sharpton!

I was, needless to say stunned at the skill that must have went into altering this photo to hide the real truth.  Obama wasn’t meeting with Reverend Al Sharpton at all!  He had obviously been photographed confronting a mecha-Sharpton in a twisted Mexican standoff!
A few things that Must be taken into account about the real photo: Mecha-Sharpton is armed with a chainsaw for a hand, and apparently can be wound up with a large key for extra powerful attacks.  Also, our President must be experienced in battling evil robots from the future, as he’s armed himself with a sword/gun Combination, as we all know this is the best weapon for fighting robots of any kind, especially one s from the future.   Additionally the portrait in the background is now a portrait of Ron Pearlman smoking a cigar.  Why this was covered up is unknown,  the greater mystery being why Reverend Al Sharpton has a large portrait of a Jewish character actor in his office.
No explanation was given for the photo, and the story behind it wasn’t revealed anywhere in the message.  The picture shows a small part of what is doubtless a frikkin-AWESOME fight scene, most likely involving missiles being shot from Mecha-Sharpton’s chest, a machine gun coming out of his mouth ,some really cool martial arts moves from Obama,  and in all likelihood the president running on the wall to avoid machine gun fire.    This epic battle, worthy of an  issue of  “Magnus: Robot Fighter” had one of the following possible outcomes:
1. Obama wins,  Mecha-Sharpton is annihilated, and the real Reverend Al Sharpton  is rescued from the future, the world is safe . . .for now.
2. Mecha Sharpton Wins, Captures our president, dragging him back to the future and throwing him into stasis.  Then Replacing the president with a roboticic replacement that probably transforms into a motorcycle.
3. Both Combatants fight until they’ve completely spent.   Just as the Military arrives to capture the Mecha-Sharpton but he escapes safely into the future just before the military storms into the room.  This lead to a military mission to a future to rescue the REAL Al Sharpton.
What is the real truth? My greatest fear is that I may never know.  Whoever altered this photo has an agenda, be it good or bad is unclear.  When I learn more, rest assured you folks will be the first to know!
The Samurai Has Spoken
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2 Comments

  1. I knew it! I just knew it! The doom speaking ferrets of Sugar Creek were right!


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